Tag: dark

Three Days of Storm (Short story)

Part 2 of 4

CHAPTER 1

She woke up to the smell of eggs like every day. She slept so early yesterday since Adam will be leaving in a few days she, Rose and Adam had been making plans of hanging out a lot more over. Watching movies, shopping, hiking they even went to play paintball. It was a good thing she took the weekend off, she could sleep in and afford to be lazy without having to worry about being late. The weather was so gloomy she didn’t feel like getting up at all, it might rain today heavily was a forecast. She took a quick hot shower and got dressed in a pair of shorts and a loose t-shirt. She brushed her curly hair and put them up, slipped her phone in the pocket and went downstairs. Nana kissed her on the cheek and set her breakfast. They both sat on the table in comfortable silence eating and reading the newspaper. They didn’t need to talk all the time they were perfectly fine sitting in silence. After living together for eight years they shared a good understanding. She loved her nana; she was April’s only family and she cherished her more than anything. She was helping nana with the plates when her phone rang loudly making her jump in shock.

She looked at the caller id. It was Adam, why was he calling her now? They usually hang out in the evening on weekends. “Hello.” He chirped, wow someone is in a good mood.

“Hi, what’s up?” She asked casually. There was a long pause at his end, she didn’t know why but she just had a bad feeling about this. What was wrong with her? Bad feeling? Really? She has totally lost it.

Finally he spoke. “What are you doing now? Can you come to my place for sometime but just hurry?” He said impatiently.

Ok, this was not bad. She gets to spend time with him since he will be leaving soon. “Yeah sure. I’ll be there in ten.” She said.

She will get to change her top and walk to his place, he lived close by. “Great, see you in few.” He said excitedly and hung up.

He had already hung up before she could say anything else. Nana looked at her curiously. “What happened?”

“I don’t know. It was Adam he asked me to come by.” She said with a sigh. “I will just go get changed.” She replied and nana nodded.

Here comes the million dollar question, what to wear? She had a closet full of clothes still she had no clue what to wear. It should be casual yet classy, she didn’t want Adam to ask why she arrived all dressed up. She picked out a baby pink off shoulder top and slipped it on quickly and a pair of black jeans. She brushed her hair and left it open, she was done. She said her goodbyes to nana and started walking towards his house, she reached within ten minutes, and the front door was closed. She knocked softly but no response. She could hear voices from the backyard; she went around the house and stopped dead on her tracks as the scenes unfolded before her.

Adam was kneeling on one knee holding a ring box in his hand, saying something that she couldn’t make out. Rose stood in front of him looking shocked. April was froze on the spot, didn’t move a muscle. She was so shocked that she didn’t know what to do, scream or run, she just wanted the ground to open up and swallow her whole. This can’t be happening, it was only a dream she told herself, she shut her eyes for a few seconds and opened them again. Oh my God! It was not a dream it was real, she couldn’t believe she could still stand on her own feet, she felt her legs going weaker and weaker every second. Rose finally smiled at Adam and he slipped the ring on her finger and then they kissed. No, why was this happening? They couldn’t even stand each other most of the time, always argued and now they are kissing, he proposed to her. April couldn’t believe her eyes.

She felt tears rolling down her cheeks like streams. She was angry, jealous and hurt, so many emotions were running through her, she wanted to punch them, throw things then slump on the floor and cry till she got sick. She should be happy that her best friends in the world are engaged but happiness is the last thing she wanted about to feel. She took control of her body slowly and started taking small steps backwards, moving away from them and his parents who had such broad smiles on their faces. She turned around the corner from where she came in and ran towards her house as fast as she could. The tears hadn’t slowed since they first started flowing; her eyes were starting to sting. It thundered loudly and it began to rain.

She slowed her pace just a bit. She was not even sure if she was running in the right direction or not but she kept on moving. She wanted to run away from the grief that was threatening to take over her. The pain alone was getting harder to bear every passing second. She ran into something or someone she didn’t really understand but she didn’t fall she was steadied by two strong arms around me. Her vision was blurry and it was raining. She looked up to say sorry for running into them like that but it was none other than Kyle. Great, today was her lucky day, she shoved him as hard as she could and he stumbled backwards. She looked around and it was pouring hard and she was not exactly sure where she was. “Are you okay? Why are you crying?” Kyle asked softly taking a step towards her concern clear on his face.

That did it; she slumped on her knees in front of him, sobbing like a child. She wanted to stop crying and take control be strong but she couldn’t, she cried harder at her pathetic attempts to control herself. She felt a pull on her shoulders; Kyle had knelled beside her with his arm around her in a comforting way. She leaned her head on his shoulder; he was her only support and continued to sob. Adam and Rose were engaged; her best friend and the guy she has been in love with all these years are engaged. She could have felt better if it was someone else but her best friend was like rubbing salt on her wounds. Why Rose? Why not her? Was something wrong with her?  Did she simply keep people pushing away or held on to them to tightly? Was she not good enough for him? These thoughts were clouding her and she couldn’t think straight. The pain was crushing her like someone had stabbed her in the heart but somehow she was still alive. She had a million questions running through her mind, Kyle just held her to him quietly.

“Take me home please, take me home.”  She whispered to him in a pleading tone. He just nodded and helped her up without a word.

She was soaking wet, she hoped she didn’t get sick but who cared? She didn’t care about anything right now. She got into the car and they drove off. She wiped her tears roughly and sat looking outside controlling herself from having another breakdown. She had to be strong, she wanted to be. Nana always said to her that she was very brave she desperately wanted it to be true. She could get through this, she had to. She could see Kyle glancing at her every now and then from the corner of her eye but she pretended she was fine now. He walked her inside, Nana answered the door with a smile but it dropped as soon as she looked over her. She took a step forward but April ran past her straight to her room. She could hear nana asking Kyle about her please don’t tell her, she will be worried and she didn’t want her to be worried about her or be upset because of her.

Why her? Why did bad things always happen to her? She felt like she was cursed who ever got close to her left her. First her parents died leaving a hole in her heart and then Rose and Adam, the hole just keeps getting bigger and bigger. Nana came in and sat next to her by the window, she leaned her head on her shoulder, silent tears falling down her face, they sat like that for a while watching the rain hitting the window glass. She got up and slipped herself under covers, she had dried off and changed but she was still cold. Nana stroked her forehead lovingly before leaving the room and shutting off the light. Nana came back with a cup of hot chocolate and set on her table and left again. Please let today just be a dream she begged when she woke up in the morning everything would be the way it was today morning.

She knew it was not true; nothing was going to be the same again. Adam and she will never be together, Rose and her friendship will be different.  She believed that she could get over this after all she did finally accept that her parents were not coming back. She was only twelve that time now she was older; she had to be strong enough. She promised herself that she won’t cry over Adam anymore. It would be tough but she was going to be a good friend and try being happy for them. She clutched the sheets tighter around me and closed her eyes praying sleep would take over soon.

Lost

Lost

Lost in the void,

A place deep within,

Felt something was amiss.

Lost in the void,

The tunnel grew darker and melancholic.

Stuck without any light,

Wanted to stop or be stopped,

It was nothing but false hope.

The void grew bigger as did the darkness,

And with no way out,

The battle was lost.

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A Wish

A Wish

I wish you could see what I see,

I wish your heart could skip a beat like mine does,

For you to get entangled in a whirlwind of emotions like I do every time I look at you,

I wish you would realize how easy it is for us to share our lives with each other.

There is so much between us that is too hard to ignore,

Yet in some way, you remain oblivious to it,

I wish you would feel about me the way I feel about you; all at once with all my heart,

I wish.

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Troubled (Short-Story)

Troubled

 

She looked out of the window. It was a kind of day she liked; the gray clouds covering the sky, an unexplained gloominess in the air and the silence. She loved this atmosphere a little too much; it was during these days the darkness was consuming everyone and she wasn’t the only one drowning in it. She smiled to herself; a storm was brewing, perfectly poetic. She knew a thing or two about storms; they matched the chaos in her head.

She didn’t understand it herself; the years of turmoil had left her numb. There was no escaping it, she knew it now. It’s sad really, giving up on life like this being hopeless and uncertain at such a young age. She had given up on her life, family, friends, relationships or any hope for things to be okay. She had seen her fall apart, tears falling down her cheeks, she had been helpless to stop it yet she felt guilty.

A slow tentative step towards the open window, she inhaled deeply and exhaled. With an exasperated sigh, she kept staring outside. Life is unfair everyone used to tell her but being overly optimistic and idealistic she never believed it. She was always just or tried to be so why would anything go wrong; she had no idea what would happen. Those naïve thoughts now locked away tightly in a corner of her heart never to be opened again. A perfect day, she thought again, a gloominess to match hers and a sense of an impending doom.

Today, she was going to be free from it all. The hurt, heartbreak, disappointments, she was going to forget about them. The past wasn’t worth dwelling upon; it was worth letting go even if it meant a part of her going away with it. A sense of hope awakened in her, hope to find happiness and peace. She closed her eyes gathering courage and took brave steps towards her freedom, her choice; this time she was in control no one else.

Someone called out her name but she tuned it out, she had come too far to stop even for a minute. She could almost taste the freedom. “Next time around it will be better.” She thought to herself. “Next time life won’t be unfair.” An abyss of darkness started to surround her, she was scared, she wanted to open her eyes but she didn’t dare. She heard someone scream her name but she didn’t care. She was going to be free; free of all the pain inside her.

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Everything I Never Told You – Celeste Ng.

Everything I Never Told You – Celeste Ng

It’s a book I have been meaning to read for a while now. Finally, when I got around to reading it, I finished reading it really quickly and it’s amazing. It is a good book no doubt but it’s not exactly an easy read. The novel is about an American Chinese family. The book begins with the disappearance of Lydia Lee; she is the middle child of James and Marilyn Lee and also their favorite. The book is set in the 1970’s in a small town in Ohio. The lives of everyone in the family are turned upside down once Lydia’s body is found at the bottom of a lake. The narrative then encompasses each of the family members perspectives and it shifts from past to present.

The book is written beautifully, every single emotion felt by the characters is described so perfectly, there is never a sense of detachment towards any characters because of this. The oldest son Nath is such a sympathetic character, he is brushed aside by his parents his relationship with his father James is strained because Nath is different than the person James wants him to be. Hannah is the youngest daughter and she is pretty much neglected by everyone in the family. The tone of the book lingers in sadness from the start but Hannah’s chapters just hits you hard; she is a quiet little girl who is the most observant one in her family, she blends in the background so often that the characters don’t even know if she is in their presence.

In the beginning, I’ll admit Lydia’s character didn’t intrigue me much but as the story unravels I couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. She is the sole focus of her parents, she is pressurized by her parents knowingly as well as unknowingly. James and Marilyn pin all their lifelong hopes on her without realizing that it’s crushing her. As the past of James and Marilyn is slowly revealed through flashbacks you understand where they come from; James as someone who couldn’t fit in the “American” society and Marilyn who gives up on her aspirations and lives with regret.

The novel tackles sensitive topics like casual racism, sexism, and miscegenation without actually becoming a story about either of these topics. The subtleness weaved throughout the plot makes it much more effective and dramatic. All the characters are relatable and none of their emotions seem fabricated and the flow is very natural. The minor characters too like- Marilyn’s mother and Jack also play an important part in moving the plot ahead and it all adds up to the ending.

The dynamic between this family is tangible though I thought it was dysfunctional most of the time. Relationships between the characters at times are normal and at times are not, for example, Nath and Lydia. They are close but Lydia needs Nath a lot more as a support system than he needs her and the thought of him leaving for college disturbs Lydia. The plot stays focused on Lydia’s death and explores the lives of the family past and present through this incident.

The book was emotionally draining which was the reason I couldn’t read it as fast as I wanted to. It is a beautifully written book, it moves from past to present with perspective from each of the four characters seamlessly without the plot becoming confusing. The novel keeps you guessing from the beginning and you can’t wait to find out all the answers. I think it’s a must-read.

*Get a copy by clicking on the book cover above.